Something strange happens when salespeople write emails. They forget how to talk like a human.
They start using flowery language they’d never use in real life.
“Use” becomes “leverage”.
“Help” becomes “accelerate”.
And “a chat” somehow turns into "a high-level discovery session".
But this 50-word email that led to a 7-figure deal looked nothing like that…
The Email
A Sales Director at a payment processing company used this to target 50 executives at Point of Sale companies.
He booked 6 meetings, one of which resulted in a $7.5m deal 3 months later.
Here’s what the email looked like:
At first glance, your boss might find this message unprofessional. But executives find it interesting. Only one of those drives revenue.
So why did it land?
It’s not just luck. It follows a proven formula you can steal today, called AIDA.
Meet AIDA
Here’s what it stands for:
Attention: Hook them with something catchy and relevant.
Interest: Share something of interest to them.
Desire: Make them desire what you're offering.
Action: Tell them exactly what to do next.
You can make anything you write persuasive just by following these 4 steps. It’s that simple.
Let’s see how this email uses AIDA.
“Easy reading is damn hard writing” – Mark Twain
Most sales emails suck because it’s damn hard to write something easy to read.
But now you have a simple formula for effective writing.
So before you hit send on your next email, run it through AIDA.
Your inbox will thank you.
